It has been said that writing about music is like dancing about architecture. If this is the case, then I am about to metaphorically dance to the beats of a dilapidated maggot-infested shed missing a wall. So be it.

The rotting shed in question is "Hulk rules" by Hulk Hogan and The Wrestling Boot Band, a perfect example of the "if I am wildly popular at A, it stands to reason that I will be wildly popular at B" line of thought employed by many celebrities. Hulk surely thought to himself "if people pay good money to watch me jump off of turnbuckles, they'll pay to listen to me awkwardly rap, too".

Sure, it sounds like a pretty fucking atrocious album. No doubt about it. But aren't you just a little tiny bit curious? Haven't you, like me, lied awake at night, wondering what it sounds like when Hulk Hogan raps? If so, my friend, then here it the cure to your sleepless eves.

However, even with this burning curiosity, I wouldn't expect the majority of you to rush out and purchase this album. It would be

understandably degrading to plop this down on a record store counter and have to listen to some lowly hipster snicker as he rings it up. So, for those who are not bold enough to get it, or who do not have the necessary dollar to spend, I will try to describe the experience for you.

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